And so i was doing my normal scrolling up and down on Facebook when I came across my own Angie smiles write-up “love engraved in my palm” . after reading this, i was so moved that i couldn’t help it but pick up my phone to text her “eii what an awakening”. Her story reminded me of a lot more i had apparently forgotten, most importantly,Gods unending love that was exhibited in every part of my being. I suddenly felt the pinch i had gracefully been avoiding for years. Oh! how i thought my pinch proof will never fall off,hmm.
A silent struggle it has been, that pain you feel deep within you, that you can’t seem to tell anyone. Ahaa! You know when you accidentally hit your toe on a wooden object or anything hard and all you can do is jump up and down like a frog hoping from one place to the other, flip your fingers together or gnash so hard like you’re in labor. lol. The thought of it makes me laugh, that’s the silent struggle i am talking about.
Been gifted a mother, father, siblings and wonderful friends and yet still no one to confined in. Walking around wearing the broadest smile that just the sight of you causes others to smile. Mounting stages to minister with that struggle in your heart .
When you pick up the phone, scroll up and down and you can’t find a single person to share your struggles with. You finally find someone and unfortunately work or something equally important has to steal that person away. When you are able to reach out to a friend and they need to rest before they hear you out,hmm, it’s a silent struggle.
Sometimes you don’t even know who is willing to listen without judging, who will listen without going away thinking you are the worlds most sinful creature. You have spiritual fathers but non of them is able to be there right when you need them. When those you expect much from presents you lesser than less. When your past hunts you like the lion hunts for its prey. eii its a silent struggle oo, one you can’t shout but only flip your fingers and jump up and down.
So many questions i needed answers to and there was no one to answer. but guess what? God came through. I may not be over my struggle yet but God came in with the comfort i just needed. He reminded me that he need not take a nap before listening to my worries, or ask for permission to get off work to talk to me. He said, i need not look for my phone to call on him because he is always there, right beside me. All i needed to do was to mention his name. He told me, i need not check the time before calling on him, i could call him in the morning, afternoon, evening, night or even at dawn. Coming to this realization, i was embraced by the warm thought that after all its never been a silent struggle. God has been there all this while, i was just too busy and too lazy to notice. I just needed to recognize his presence.
I sort to get closer to God. To hear from him and have a beautiful conversation with him as time goes on. With his promise to never leave me nor forsake me (Deuteronomy 31:6), i believe that silent struggle will turn to a noisy joy. Jesus is that only friend who can help you with whatever struggle you may be going through. He’s the best friend anyone could have, his friendship is genuine and true to even comprehend. I believe that if you make a conscious effort to recognize the presence of God in your life, you will be able to overcome every struggle. Join me as we overcome this struggle because the word of God says we are more than conquerors( Romans 8:37). to be continued…
Psalms 34: 19
Many are the afflictions of the righteous but the LORD delivers him from them all.